Action Fantasy Original Characters Satire

Plausible Deniability: Desert Banishment

The gang meandered the desert without food or water for days…just endless beer from Tekra’s magic stein.

“I’m gonna eat some sand” said Aura.

Aura, Caoihme, Burn, Nikolai, and Elon woddled through the sand. In the intense heat the crew could hardly think clearly; but all at once, they saw a shift in the sand. At first no one new whether or not what they were seeing was real, until a slythering creature approached under the shallow sand.

“I’m gonna eat more sand” said Aura.

Aura grabbed some more sand and brought it to her mouth. Everyone’s attention was divided between a slithering potential threat and Aura’s sandiness. She blew the sand towards Nikolai and Burn the instant a Herculean snake appeared out of the dune.

Elon reached into his pouch and pulled out a handful of pixie dust. He used his outlandish blowing skills to blow the dust at the serpent. Moments later, the snake broke out in tears.

“Oh my god; are you okay?” Said Elon in his concerned pixie voice.

“The fuck did you do Elon!?!” Screamed the entire squad in sync.

“I didn’t mean to…” answered the pixie “…I didn’t mean to.”

Burn pulled out his staff and attempted to help the saddest snake. He thought up a spell, and he thought it up quick. He waved the staff as everybody stared at the crying serpent. Its head fell off.

Burn stared straight into the deep eyes of the head.

“Shit” he said.



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Mrs. Musk
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