Fan Fiction

Marvel’s Greatest Tourist: Issue #8

April 26, XXXX

Beast and I made it to the source of his psychic message by a jeep. Beast was the first one to jump out and go to Jean, who was unconscious. I tended to the others, and they looked pretty out of shape. I went into my bag in the backseat.

Jean: “…sc…Scoo…”

Beast: “It’s okay, Jean. I am here with help.”

I found a bandaid in my first-aid kit and transmuted it. Everybody’s wounds started to close. The X-Men got up but were still a bit banged up.

Jean: “They took Scott.”

Beast: “Who?”

Wolverine: “A bunch of crazy &!+(#3$. We were just finished fighting The Juggernaut , and then they popped out of nowhere and attacked us. Then they snagged Cyclops. Graaaah!”

The guy in the yellow spandex just sliced down a boulder with steel claws. That’s pretty metal.

Beast: “Jean, you and the others return to the institute while Logan, Barnibus, and I will try to rescue Scott.”

Wolverine: “Barni-who?”

Locale: “Me…I go by Locale too.”

Wolverine: “Growl…Who are you supposed to be, newbie?”

Locale: “I was trying to visit Prof. Xavier, then Hank heard Jean’s message, and I wanted to help.”

Wolverine: “This is your help, Beast? He’s just a kid.”

Beast: “Don’t be fooled by his appearance. He has quite a unique power.”

Wolverine: “For his sake, it better be…Sniff…Sniff…I got his scent. It’s faint, but it is not too far. Let’s go, you two.”


The Watcher: “In a dungeon, Scott Summers found himself bound to a wall with chains. He has to know idea why the Femme Fatale took him.”

Footsteps could be heard from above Cyclops and soon reached the stairway nearby. The women from before arrived, escorting a lady in black and fiery red hair.

Cyclops: “Madelyne?”

Madelyne: “Scott, my love, I go by The Goblin Queen now, and soon you will be my king.”

Cyclops: “You don’t need to do this. I love Jean. And when I thought she was dead, I saw you as my rebound. Then she came back to me and…Aaahaahh!”

The Goblin Queen fired a blast of energy to stop Cyclops from talking.

Goblin Queen: “That’s enough! Don’t you get it? I love you more than that homewrecker. We were meant to be together!”

Cyclops: “You cannot force me to love you. ORRRaaaahhh!”

Goblin Queen (After another energy blast): “Silence! My Femme Fatale, destroy Jean Grey and the X-Men!”

Cyclops: “No! You ca- ermmmmm!”

The Goblin Queen locked lips with Cyclops as her minions left to prepare for their next attack.


We made it to where Wolverine’s nose had guided us. I never thought there was an actual castle around here. Wolverine suggested we go in arms flailing, but I had a less “noticeable” option. I transmuted the air and used its invisibility as a veil around us. With it, we got to the front door, and Wolverine jimmied the lock with his claw. His nose guided us to the basement. We soon heard a lot of moaning and other indiscernible sounds as we got closer. After the last stairway down, we found Cyclops kissing a woman with the skimpiest outfit I had ever seen. I had to avert my eyes for a second. The woman noticed us with a lot of hate in her eyes.

Goblin Queen: “FEMME FATALE!”

A sinister light blinded us, and as it faded, many other women appeared, including Knockout from that Helicarrier and the NYC attack and her partner. 

Goblin Queen: “Destroy them ALL!”

Locale: “Sorry, but I am here to rescue, not be the one who needs it.”

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AgentFacultas avatar
I also go by the pen name Regis Floats, the author of The Good Enough Evil/ Bonsatilum Series.

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